Question:
Dear Luang Phaw, how can we train our descendants to be disciplined
and well-organized when they grow up?
Answer
by Venerable Dhattajeevo Bhikku
Talking about discipline, it is straightly about habits, so
it must definitely come from daily things we repeatedly do, think and talk.
Since you see how valuable discipline is to your descendants, the country and
the religion, it’s really good that you would like to discipline your
descendants since their young age for you don’t have to force them when they
grow up.
All kinds of discipline start from the family. What shall we
do then? First, you need to discipline your descendants about small stuff. What
is the small stuff? It is the discipline of themselves starting from their
eating, sleeping, wearing clothes, cleaning the house, using the bathroom and
toilet, etc. We have to train them about these things before going to the bigger
stuff, and then we will have disciplined descendants when they grow up. Let me
give you some examples.
First example, we must train our descendants to go to bed at
specific time that is not later than 10 PM and wake up since the early morning before
the dawn like 4 or 5 AM. It’s such a mistake if we let them stay up late like
midnight and sleep late since they will have no discipline. Why? Because if they
go to bed late, they wouldn’t want to wake up in the morning; when they have to
get up, they will not want to though they are already awake, they will just
roll over in bed and stretch their bodies to be relieved from the laziness. By
this, their discipline of time has been ruined.
On the other hand, if they go to bed at 10 PM and wake up at
the early morning, they will always be alert and energetic because they get
enough sleep and will be ready for work no matter what their work is; ex. study,
housework or career. By this training, they will automatically have discipline
of time.
Not only their bed and wake-up time we have to care about,
but also dining time. When they have to wake up, they need to no matter how
late they go to bed; and when the breakfast time comes, they need to eat
together and if they are too tired, they can go back to bed later; but if they
don’t wake up at all, their schedule will be all ruined.
When they follow their dining and sleeping schedule, the
time for going to school and doing homework will also be in schedule. Only if
they stay up late, they will not do their homework and other schedule will be
ruined, and then they will be too lazy to go to school. When it happens, they
will flee away from school and associate with wayward friends who will lead
them to cause fighting. We have to give them the discipline of time. What time?
The time that is related to four requisites for comfort, i.e. dining time, bedtime,
wake-up time, laundry time, housework time, etc. Even before going to bed, we
have to manage time for them to chant and then pay homage at their parent’s
feet before going to bed. Everything must be in schedule.
Other than the discipline of time, the discipline of money
needs to be followed too. Don’t give the children too much or too little of money
since they shouldn’t be hungry at school; or if they have too much money, they
might not arrive school but socialize with friends and be away from school.
These things need to be seriously followed for they will
become the children’s discipline. The discipline of time and of money are
really important since they can control the other schedule and our children
will become honest because the ones who are not punctual and like to waste
money will often lie because they are lacking of discipline; but if the
children clearly know their schedule and the limit of money and they are
well-trained by us, they will become disciplined and no matter how old they
are, they will have discipline on everything.
