The Meaning of a True Friend

Meditation

Mediation for Beginners

 

The Meaning of a True Friend

 

In order to observe more easily the behaviours of those with whom we call friends

 

In the previous chapter we defined the meaning of ‘friends’ as those in whom we invest time, energy and respurces for example, someone with whom we associate regularly, working together or at least in the same place. In fact, such a definition is only a small part of a much wider scope of meaning covered by the word ‘friend’. In order to observe more easily the behaviours of those with whom we call friends, the Lord Buddha classified two categories of friends: the True Friend and the False Friend. The sixteen forms of cgaracters of False Friends are presented and discussed in the previous chapter. They are a set of tell-tale signs that can be used to filter out false friends from our human environment. If, on the contrary, someone’s characters is opposite to that of false friends-if they have good bahaviour patterns and are responsible-the Lord Buddha referred to them as true friends with whom we can safely associate and in whom we can wholeheartedly place our trust – they would never bring harm to us.

 

Encourage you towards wholesome behaviour

 

The Lord Buddha subdivided True Friends into four groups.

 

1. The Helpful Friend [upakaraka]

2. The Constant Friend [samanasukhadukkha]

3. The friend of Wise Counsel [atthakkhayi]

4. The Sympathetic Friend [anukampaka]

 

He identified each group by four distinguished examples of behaviours-giving a total of sixteen characteristics to look for in a good friend.

 

A helpful friend is one who:

 

1. Protects you even when you are off your guard;

2. Helps protect your property even when you neglect if;

3. Is your refuge in times of danger;

4. Always provides you with twice as much as you asked for;

 

A helpful friend sincerely and truly cares about his friend, He does not want his friend to get himself in trouble. He courageously protects and supports his friend as if his friend’s problem is his own. Anyone who can support and protect his friends like this must have enough courage to also protect his society, his notion and his religion from danger.

 

A constant friend is constant in bad times and good:

 

1. They confide in you;

2. They don’t go spreading your secrets around;

3. They don’t abandon you when you fall on hard times;

4.  They would even die in your place;

 

A constant friend is constant in bad times and good

 

From the characters above of a constant friend, we can say that he is a reliable and responsible person to his friends.

 

They give you good counsel:

 

1. They warn you against unwholesome behaviour;

2. Encourage you towards wholesome behaviour;

3. Save up now things to tell you;

4. Point you in the direction of heaven.

 

These characteristics show that show that such a friend always keep a protective eye on his friend and leads his friend to pro

 

1. They don’t laugh at your misfortunes;

2. They congratulate you on your good fortune;

3. They speak out against anyone who maligns you;

4. They stand up for those who speak who maligns you;

 

These characteristics show that a symphathetic friend is someone who will always give you moral support and can share good time and bad times with you.

 

As you can see, all sixteen characteristics of the True Friend are characteristics that lead to the creation of positivity. These sixteen characteristics of the True Friend can be used as a benchmark to indicate True Friends.

 

 

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